well, this is my very first REAL ramadhan.
Don't misunderstood 'real'. I called it as real ramadhan as this is the first year ever since I re-learn about Islam. A real ramadhan, well I know what exactly ramadhan brings, the offers, the double-triple rewards, the fiesta, the trials and everything. But, usually I take it light, ignoring every thing and just sunk into my own dead imagination world, begging for happiness at dunya.
and this ramadhan is different. It is different and has to be different. You're growing up and you are getting to know about a lot of things whether it is good or bad.
But, I am weird why people are having hard times to just realize that this is the golden opportunity and the only chance that they have in a year. Some are very sure that they'll meet the next ramadhan and keep on saying the same dialogue for every year.
I deal with folks in the hostel and it isn't that easy and getting harder when it comes to face your own friends. It is nice to see my juniors'*especially* improvements in their daily ibadah in this holy month.
We had this one small programme, Al Quran Marathon - and the objective of it, is just to help those who haven't khatam the al quran and those who want to khatam the al quran. we sit together. You'll have your own naqibah and get an al Quran for yourself, start reading. SIMPLE. right after 'asr and maghrib prayers.
but still still still, there are some folks didn't turn up themselves for the session. I ain't being angry or mad. not at all. Just frustrated, not a lil' bit but seriously frust-tra-ted.
I know among the ones that absent from the session, can't even read the al quran, read the al quran like you're reading a book and etc. I ain't bringing up this issue just because I know how to read al quran or what. Hey, I have flaws and imperfect at all. But, this is the responsibilities for the muslims. I am a muslim and I am responsible to make sure people in my circle know the al quran, know how to read it and have the quran inside their hearts no only in minds.
There was one night, the head girl asked me to give a talk about taraweeh prayer, the AQM. I accidentally said this
"Saya tak nak paksa tapi korang nak ke malu nanti bila besar, awak sorang sorang je tak boleh baca quran? Baik malu sekarang nak belajar mengaji daripada malu bila besar, lidah dah keras, kebal."
nak bantai melayu.
Mungkin ada yang terasa, terus pusing belakang. ada yang terus cuit kawan-kawan ditepi sambil tersengih-sengih.
"Kalau awak ni golongan genius al quran, tajwid, qiraat dan taranum lekat dalam dada. Ilmu quran tinggi, tak nak join saya pun tak kisah. Langsung."
Dewan almost senyap. Ada yang menunduk, mungkin tengah fikir tahap pengajian al quran masing - masing. Naqibah ada yang tersengih dekat belakang bila tengok anak buah masing - masing punya reaksi. Yang memusing belakang tadi, ada yang keluar dewan. Tapi, kebanyakkannya tak pusing - pusing, terus menghadap dinding.
Kenapa susah sangat nak dengar kenyataan tentang diri sendiri? Bila sebut tentang kekurangan diri, terus pekak telinga. Automatik.
Not only them.
You are also like that.
I do it too.
The humming of truth is just painful, but it makes us to be a better person.
Lastly,Enjoy the fiesta. Semoga dapat kenikmatan ramadhan! Allahu akram :)